As it was midday, all of the local animals were out running errands and enjoying the weather, the first uncharacteristically mild day of the season. As the tomcat walked by, he greeted each of them enthusiastically. He was an indoor, nocturnal cat, and it had been a while since he had experienced this flurry of activity during the day, and he had missed all of the hustle and bustle of his friends and neighbors.
After a while, he had walked the length of the road, but because it was such a nice day, he decided to continue exploring. He had never gone this far away from his barn before. Stepping off of the road and onto a patchy, grassy area, he felt the exhilaration of the unknown. As the cat realized his freedom, he pranced through the tall weeds, going in any direction his paws would take him. His senses were overtaken by the experience: he could see every fine detail on each blade of the tall grass, and he could smell the fresh scent of the warm summer air.
After a while of frolicking through the field, the cat saw an opening in some reeds up ahead. As he approached it, he heard a soothing noise unlike anything he had ever heard before. He walked up to the clearing and saw a small stream of rushing water. As he had never seen such a thing before, he was perplexed. However, he was determined to make the most of his day off. He said to himself, "I've come this far already. I might as well check this out."
He walked up to the stream and looked down. There, staring back at him, was a friendly face--that of another cat. Excitedly, he introduced himself. He was startled when the cat mimicked his words exactly, but brushed it off. "What a beautiful day, huh?" he continued joyfully.
The cat in the water continued to copy him. Now becoming confused, he asked, "How did you know what I was going to say?" Still the other cat mocked him, this time with a puzzled look on his face. The tomcat realized that this mysterious cat was even mimicking his facial expressions. "Stop taunting me!" he said, now annoyed at the other cat's rudeness. But it would not stop, instead continuing to annoy the poor cat. At this point, the anger on the water-feline's face was enough to be alarming to the tomcat. Now both frustrated and scared, he reached out his paw and tried to attack the other cat, and was startled when it mirrored his actions. Frightened and disturbed, he jumped up so as not to be attacked himself. This sudden movement caused him to slip off of the bank and plunge headfirst into the water. Too late did the cat realize that he was merely talking to his reflection in the clear water, and he bemoaned his ignorance and impatience.
The cat at the riverbank. Source: Wikimedia Commons.
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Author's note: This is a loose retelling of the story of The Wonderful Tar-Baby from the Brer Rabbit unit. In the original, Brer Rabbit comes across a doll made of sticky tar, placed by one of his trickster friends, Brer Fox, as a form of revenge. As Mr. Rabbit tries to talk to the doll, it obviously doesn't respond, and he gets easily frustrated at the being. He begins to violently beat the doll, but only manages to get stuck in it.
In my story, I maintained a similar theme but changed the characters and removed the trickster: here, the only antagonist is the cat's own thoughts. In this case, instead of not responding whatsoever, the cat's reflection does a similarly impolite thing in mimicking the cat, which the cat interprets as mocking. The ultimate moral is the same as that of the original story, though: be patient and understand the entirety of the situation before acting rashly. The last line is intended to show the cat's regret, but that he has learned his lesson. The reader can only hope that he can survive in order to apply what he has learned in the future (I will try to incorporate a scene in which the cat is rescued so as not to make the ending so morbid).
Bibliography:
"The Wonderful Tar-Baby Story"
Uncle Remus: His Songs and Sayings
Joel Chandler Harris, 1881.
Hey Chelsea! Wonderful story this week! I thought that you did a great job of making this story completely your own while still sticking to the same overall theme and lesson of the original story. I thought that you had a lovely flow to your story that made it easy to read and to visualize the story as it unfolded. I also really like the image that you chose to go along with your story! Great job!
ReplyDeleteChelsea, I thought your story, and the idea of the poor confused cat, was very cute. I really liked that you created your own situation in the story analogous to that in the original story, and managed to keep the message the same. You did a great job of adding your own elements to the story - adding and removing characters and creating a different setting. Great Work!
ReplyDeleteHey Chelsea,
ReplyDeleteLet me just start off my saying wow!! I had no idea this was the Tar-Baby Story until I got to your authors note. You are most certainly a master of disguise. One thing I really loved about your retelling was the use of details in your story. I felt as though it really brought it to life because you were further emphasizing little details. You gave the reader relatable details as to while the cat did so many of his activities instead of just saying that he did them. I was a little confused when the cat heard something he had never heard before. You were referring to a stream I believe but then you sort of repeat yourself saying that it was something he had not seen either, so maybe perplexed then had not seen? What I love most about your story was that you took a trick and a decoy and related it to ones reflection! I am a littler flabbergasted by that association because it is so wonderfully amazing! It is like all those videos of kittens and puppies that find their reflection in the mirror for the first time and freak out! You did such an excellent job with this retelling! Amazing work!
Hey Chelsea, I am very impressed with your retailing of “The Wonderful Tar-Baby” story. I liked that you basically retold the whole story in a completely different direction but you still managed to make the connection to the original story! Your story was very easy to read and made me laugh! It also had a very good meaning behind it. I like when stories have deeper meanings because it makes you think a little more. The moral of both of the stories really is what connected the two. Thinking before you act is such an important life lesson. I also really enjoyed the character of the cat in your story. The cat was so cute and I loved that you added all of the details of how the cat was originally an indoor animal and got set free. I’m sure that a lot of indoor animals feel this way when they are finally able to explore outside! The way you described the scenery and the cats’ thoughts was very helpful for readers. I was able to picture the scene playing out in my mind very easily. Your storybook looks great and I am looking forward to reading more of your stories!
ReplyDeleteHi Chelsea! I loved your retelling of this story. It was really cute and creative and took a very different route than the original while still keeping the moral intact. I like the idea of the mocking reflection much more than the doll which doesn't talk from the original story. I also like how you made the cat’s almost attack, then being afraid of the attack become his downfall. His fear and his anger worked in combination which I think is often the case when people don’t know what is happening around them. The idea that you need to think rationally and try to understand your surroundings and situation was very well told. Also the story was very well written. Great job so far! Keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteI love how you decided to retell this story and I think that you did such a great job! Overall I feel that you did a good job of keeping most of the necessary elements, themes and concepts there. You were also able to add in a few new things to make the story your own. Overall you did a great job!
ReplyDeleteHey Chelsea, I loved this story to bits! I was captivated by the title and the beautiful photo, so I decided to do this as my free choice! The tomcat seems like such a friendly character to all of the folk he passed by. You did an excellent job of giving us the details that the tomcat experiences, such as the detail of the grass blades and the scent of the air. The fact that he was unaware of his own reflection reminds me of my own cat. He does the same thing! I can imagine if you didn't know what a reflection was, you'd be annoyed at it mocking you too! I would feel silly too once I figured out that I was talking and getting mad at myself. Silly cat. I appreciate the details you put into this entire story. It made it really easy to read and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Your portfolio is coming along very nicely and I am looking forward to reading more from you, because I love the way you write! I really appreciate the author's note. I think it was a great idea to make the cat his own antagonist and the moral was definitely seen at the end.
ReplyDeleteHey Chelsea, I really enjoyed this story that you wrote. The changes you made from the original story you based it on are so unique and creative!
ReplyDeleteI was worried at first reading the beginning of the tale. The fact that the cat was an indoor cat and was traveling so far from home had me concerned, as I've had a couple cats disappear this way when they snuck out. I was sad to see my fears realized, but it was truly the cat's rash decisions that led to his own downfall. I think showing the cat's remorse is a great way to illustrate the moral of your story.
Hey Chelsea,
ReplyDeleteThis is the first time I have done a portfolio for the internet assignment so I am glad I got a good one for the first time around. I really liked how you transformed the original story of Brer Rabbit, it still had the essence of the story but it was distinctly your own. After I realized it was a retelling of the Tar Baby, I wondered how you would pull off the tar baby and I must say the use of its reflection in water was great. It made sense to the context of the cat and also stayed true to the original. Having a cat myself, I can easily see all of your story playing out like it did and with the cat as the main focus, you did not need the trickster at all since cats usually get into trouble with nothing else around. You did a good job of transforming the unmoving, nonreactive tar baby into an "antagonist" who mocked and copied the tomcat. You also did a good job of describing the environment and gave a very vivid description of the tomcat's surroundings. Overall, very good job and I will have to check out what you write later in the semester.
Hey Chelsea! What a wonderful story! I love cats and love how you changed the original to fit another situation. I thought it was so funny and cat-like, it was great! I have tried to get my cat to see his own reflection, because I thought it would be funny, but he won't cooperate. But I totally get a cat getting frustrated and angry over something so silly! You wrote with great detail and imagery, especially in the beginning. I think you described a cat perfectly, running around the grass and exploring places. Cats always get into trouble when they're wandering around! I think this story is a great retell of the original and you made it fun and entertaining to read. Thank you for sharing! Hope you have a great semester.
ReplyDeleteHi Chelsea,
ReplyDeleteSince I had previously commented on your introduction, I decided to go ahead and read another one of your retellings. I thought your story of the cat being frightened of his own reflection was very entertaining! Also, all the details you gave in the beginning of your story were great! I think learning all the circumstances of a situation before acting, is such an important lesson that we should all heed to. Nice job!
This story is so creative! I have not read the Tar Baby, but after reading your author's note I understood what all you changed and I was very impressed at your idea to use the cat's reflection. You included a lot of great detail in your story, such as with the grass and the cat's feeling of freedom; I think that added some really good perspective to the story. I like how you had originally set up the cat to be accustomed to barn yard ways, making his detour more meaningful. I thought the rest of the story was hilarious, with the cat getting all frustrated at his own reflection! This story was such a fun read and I look forward to reading more of your stories!
ReplyDeleteThis story makes me really happy! I'm a huge dog person, and I can't stand cats, so any time that something goes wrong for a cat, it makes me smile. Anyways, I think you did a really good job of giving us an idea of what was going through the cat's head during this story. I wonder how I acted when I saw my reflection for the first time haha. Nice story!
ReplyDelete